i died the day you left me

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Tuesday..

Marketing presentation went ok. Luckily there's still a ray of hope in my life amidst all the bad stuffs.

Sometimes I really hope life would be simpler. If I were a flower by the roadside and not a human, then I wouldn't need to care about all this right? Such complicated matters. Sigh.

If being a happy-go-lucky joker = childish, and people don't like chidish people, so shouldn't I stop being childish and stop being the joker? No point being funny anyway.

All the best for exams!

ShAtTeReD mY bRoKeN hEaRt AgAiN oN » 10:32 PM

Friday, March 27, 2009

Friday..

Finally! It's friday!

The dreadful week is over. Handed in some papers and met some deadlines. Now all that's left is marketing presentation next week.I kind of like this blogging exercise actually, started off as a obligation for me but now I'm looking forward to penning my thoughts down at the blog. Helps me to reflect and flush out those negative feelings. Looking forward to a studious weekend ahead.

With the exam cloud looming overhead, stress is in the air.

P.S. Been participating in some psychology research recently that involves blogging.

ShAtTeReD mY bRoKeN hEaRt AgAiN oN » 9:19 PM

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Wednesday..

It was a normal day for me at school, too tired as usual to think about other things other than academic.

The day made itself difficult for me. I sort of flopped a quiz which I studied very hard for, and that it totally demoralizing, and I had troubles with my marketing presentation. What a stressful week, and I didn't even have time to start studying yet.

I really dislike exam periods in the university. Although university life is rather fun, it is periods like this that make us all feel very miserable. Argh.

ShAtTeReD mY bRoKeN hEaRt AgAiN oN » 12:22 PM

Monday, March 23, 2009

monday..

It was a rather regimental day for me as I went ahead with the tasks for the typical school day. Going about lectures and tutorials and rushing for those venues. It's one of those days that you get pass and then pondered what you actually did because you didn't have time to process it.

However it was rather enjoyable with good company over those boring lectures. I enjoyed marketing lectures every monday because it was less technical and I have great company whom I can chat with, although I'm not suppose to talk during lessons. We had a lot of fun and I really hope time can slow down for us all. As everyday went pass I would hope that I was at the previous, but few can turn back the hands of time.

I have a quiz tomorrow so I hope everything will be okay. Endless quizzes and papers. Gosh, when will this ever end?

ShAtTeReD mY bRoKeN hEaRt AgAiN oN » 7:39 PM

Monday, March 16, 2009

deadlines are so alive..

Well, so goes another week.

Exams are looming overhead once again. Pressure is starting to build up, but by now it would be the 4th time for me experiencing this vicious cycle of the academic life. Shouldn't be too surprised about the stress and all.

Openhouse theme for NTU this year is "L.I.F.E at NTU". Stands for Learning Is Fun and Exciting. I guess exams are fun and exciting as well? Life in NTU as a student sure is fun and exciting right? Yeah right.

It was held yesterday. Went over to take a look after my project meeting. However didn't really see anyone familiar there even though the male's batch coming in this year would be my batch (1988), strange. It seems pretty happening though, with the freebie giveaways and the nice ambassadors and helpers around. There were new courses available too! Cutoffs for this year still remained high overall. I guess it is quite hard to get to uni after all, well at least not that easy. CCA booths were also up, with the various exciting stuffs to join. Even the halls are propped up for visits and campus tours.

Not bad in general. I still feel a sense of belonging being a student here. I guess uni life is indeed an unique experience. Should have it like 8 years so as to spread out the stress and also have more fun. Well wishful thinking is allowed right? =P

ShAtTeReD mY bRoKeN hEaRt AgAiN oN » 1:42 AM

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

fine and dandy..

No worries no worries..

I was just ranting I suppose. The world continues to turn and nothing has yield to me. I suppose I still have to live on.

So I expect everything to be fine and dandy. That flowers will bloom and the sun will shine, everything will be back like before and I'm suppose to be happy and smiling. Normality, as it seems, has bred much contempt. Conversely, contempt itself has develop much familiarity to me.

Perhaps one day I will look back on this and realize that this is all gibberish. A truly happy man is one who doesn't hanker. I'm alright.. alright.

ShAtTeReD mY bRoKeN hEaRt AgAiN oN » 1:41 AM

Monday, March 09, 2009

suffocated..

I can't really breathe properly, and I can't find an avenue to let it out. It's choking me and this feeling is not nice at all.

I don't want any of this. But sometimes things are not within my control. After all if they are then there will be no unhappiness in this world right? Obviously I should have realize by now that there are few happy endings in this world. Maybe there are but maybe in my life there won't be any for me. What a sad reality to accept. Things never went smoothly for me and I'm always the onlooker for others' happily-ever-after. What more, I don't have a clue how to solve this problem.

Perhaps I'm going to be different. No more nice guy. The good guys always die first in reality. Furthermore I always talk too much, a big no no. Passive is the way to go nowadays.

Life seem to have lose its appeal for me. I no longer find any meaning other than living for the sake of living. Such a painful irony.

ShAtTeReD mY bRoKeN hEaRt AgAiN oN » 12:57 AM

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

life..

I suppose most of you have heard of the NTU stabbing case that happened yesterday right? Was quite shocked when my friend told me around 11am about the incident. I was still half awake and half alive from the saturated lecture previously when I learnt about the news. Later in the day when I went to library and saw the channel news asia report then I realise the seriousness of the whole thing.

Life and death is just separated by a thin thread don't you think?

Sigh. I suppose when you no longer find anything to live for in life, and that it has lose its meaning, then death won't seem so scary. After all we all have to die eventually, right?

One thing's for sure, living for the sake of living feels equally lousy. Ironic.

ShAtTeReD mY bRoKeN hEaRt AgAiN oN » 8:13 PM

pRoFiLe

bLuEsKy
JaCkSoN
21
7/1/88
cApRiCoRn

.:[sChOoLs]:.
QiHuA pRi 1995 - 2000
RiVeRsiDe SeC 2001 - 2004
PiOnEeR JuNiOr CoLLeGe 2005 - 2006
NtU HsS 2007 - cUrReNt

.:[LiKeS]:.
SuNnY dAyS
MoViEs (ExCePt HoRrOr & GoRy OnEs)
StAr GaZiNg
SiNgInG
F.I.R. - Xu YaO Ni De Ai

.:[HaTeS]:.
bAcKsTaBbErS
ChAnGiNg Of pLaN LaSt MiN
EgOiStiC PpLe

.:[HoPeS]:.
AcCePtAbLe ReSuLtS
NoT 2 MuCh StReSs
cLoSe FrEnS WhO uNdErStAnDs Me
SiMpLiCiTy N hApPiNeSs
tRuE lOvE

WiLL u EvEr CoMe BaCk...

当你选择拉远了距离
就这么自私做的决定
冲破天际飞去

排山倒海崩塌的回忆
无时无刻袭击我的心
痛得不能自己

或许你以为把这一座城市抛开
就可以终结伤害
却不明白我需要你的爱
不管多少阻碍不求什么未来
不管命运会怎么安排
我会用眼泪洗去所有的不堪
狠狠地把心痛了断
深深地把一切重来

我需要你的爱像掉进了深海
也像坠落悬崖找不到地方可以逃开
别让那些谎言把爱给活埋
当心碎成一块一块
当爱碎曾一断一断
我会等待你的爱

我会等待(我会等待)

你将那些谎言把爱给活埋